Drinking Quotes
Drinking Quotes!
Drinking Quotes| 1. | Mark Twain | The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like and do what you'd rather not. |
| 2. | W C Fields | ...more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol. |
| 3. | W C Fields | 'Twas a woman drove me to drink. I never had the courtesy to thank her. |
| 4. | W C Fields | I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. |
| 5. | W C Fields | Now don't say you can't swear off drinking, it's easy. I've done it a thousand times. |
| 6. | W C Fields | Say anything that you like about me, except that I drink water. |
| 7. | W C Fields | I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m. |
| 8. | W C Fields | I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know. |
| 9. | W C Fields | ...more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol. |
| 10. | W C Fields | My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. |
| 11. | W C Fields | 'Twas a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it. |
| 12. | W C Fields | Everyone must believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink. |
| 13. | W C Fields | I must have a drink of breakfast |
| 14. | W C Fields | I exercise extreme self-control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. |
| 15. | W C Fields | Sleep...the most beautiful experience in life .. except drink. |
| 16. | W C Fields | During prohibition he was asked, why if he didn't have a drinking problem, did he buy 300 cases of gin before it started, he replied "I didn't think prohibition would last that long." |
| 17. | Some people drink from the fountain of life, while others just rinse and spit. | |
| 18. | Everybody should believe in something - I believe I'll have another drink. | |
| 19. | Sometimes too much to drink is not enough. | |
| 20. | You can be watching T.V. and see Coca-Cola, and you know that the President drinks Coke, Liz Taylor drinks Coke, and just think, you can drink Coke too. A Coke is a Coke and no amount of money can get you a better Coke than the one the bum on the corner is drinking. All Cokes are the same and all Cokes are good. Liz Taylor knows it, the President knows it, the bum knows it, and you know it. NATIONALISM IS A CREATED PRODUCT. | |
| 21. | Sipping a cup of tea, going for a morning walk, doing your work - all these small activities make up your living. And each part, each moment of living, is meaningful. You just have to be there; otherwise, who is going to experience the meaning? People go on drinking tea, but they never are there; their minds are wandering all over the world. | |
| 22. | Isn't it wierd that we drink milk, stuff designed to nourish baby cows? How did THAT happen? Did some cattleman once say, "Oh, man, I can't wait till them calves are done so I can get ME a hit of that stuff." | |
| 23. | Warning: Do not drink the battery acid. It doesn't taste good and will hurt you. Also do not bite the tyres, especially while the bike is moving. our lawyers made us put these warnings in. | |
| 24. | Albert Camus | May I take the ridiculous position of saying that I do not like the was [Andre] Gide exalts the body. He asks it to restrain its desire to make it keener. Thus he comes dangersouly near to those who in brothel slang are called involved or brain-workers. Christianity also wants to suspend desire. But, more natural, it sees a mortification in this. My friend Vincent, who is a cooper and junior breast-stroke champion, has an even clear veiw. He drinks when he is thirsty, if he desires a woman he tries to go to bed with her, and would marry her if he loved her (this hasn't yet happened). Afterward he says: "I feel better"-- and this sums up vigorously any apology that might be made for satiety. |
| 25. | Alex Krycek | Around the office, I'm known for betraying people, but that's not all I do. Like a good rat, I drink milk. A lot of it. A minimum of 3 glasses a day gives me all the nutrients I need to effectively stab people in the back. Another plus - milk is rich in calcium, so I'll have a new arm in no time. |
| 26. | Bob Marley | Why drink and drive if I can smoke and fly? |
| 27. | Brendan Behan | Then I saw a sign which said 'Drink Canada Dry' - so we started. |
| 28. | Charles Bukowski | For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command or faith a dictum. I am my own God. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state, and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us. |
| 29. | Darth Maul | When I'm out slaughtering Jedi, I don't have to worry about getting enough calcium. That's why I drink milk. It's 9 essential nutrients help me keep my bones strong, which is good, because I'd look really stupid if one of my horns broke off. |
| 30. | F. Scott Fitzgerald, on Ernest Hemingway | He's a great writer. If I didn't think so I wouldn't have tried to kill him... I was the champ and when I read his stuff I knew he had something. So I dropped a heavy glass skylight on his head at a drinking party. But you can't kill the guy. He's not human. |
| 31. | Frank Sinatra | I feel sorry for people that don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. |
| 32. | Garrison Keillor | March is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hangover is like. |
| 33. | George Carlin | The radio ad "Hi, I'm Jeff Healey from the Jeff Healey Band. Don't drink and drive. I don't". Well, I hope you don't drive sober either Mr. Healey. You're blind for God's sake! |
| 34. | George Carlin | The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for High School. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last 9 months floating... then you finish off as an orgasm! Amen. |
| 35. | Henny Youngman | When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. |
| 36. | Jack Butler | Awe is a large flower, but a short-lived one. Besides, when God cracks a joke or two and clearly hopes you'll ask him over for a drink, you lose respect. If God wants worship, he'd better stay lonely. If he wants love, he'll have to eat shit with the rest of us. |
| 37. | Lazarus Long | Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors and miss. |
| 38. | Luis Buguel | If the devil were to offer me a resurgence of what is commonly called virility, I'd decline. 'Just keep my liver and lungs in good working order,' I'd reply, 'so I can go on drinking and smoking.' |
| 39. | Michelle Michaels of WDVE, on St. Patrick's Day | Basically, this guy was a saint, so we drink. |
| 40. | Oscar Wilde | Work is the curse of the drinking classes. |
| 41. | Pierre-Augustin de Beaumarchais | Drinking when we are not thirsty and making love at all seasons, madam: that is all there is to distinguish us from other animals. |
| 42. | Poison | I drive by the homeless sleeping on a cold dark street Like bodies in an open grave Underneath the broken old neon sign That used to read JESUS SAVESA mile away live the rich folks And I see how they're living it up While the poor they eat from hand to mouth The rich is drinkin' from a golden cupAnd it just makes me wonder Why so many lose, so few winSometimes I wish I didn't know now the things I didn't know then |
| 43. | Ptolemy | Mortal through I be, yea ephemeral, if but a moment I gaze up at the night's starry domain of heaven, Then no longer on earth I stand; I touch the Creator, And my lively spirit drinketh immortality. |
| 44. | Richard Lederer | On a camera: This camera only works when there is film inside.On a package of airline peanuts: Open packet and eat contents.On a chain saw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.On a mirror for a bicycle helmet: Remember - objects in the mirror are actually behind you.On a bottle of flavoured-milk drink: After opening, keep upright.On a steering-wheel lock: Warning - remove lock before driving. |
| 45. | Stendhal | Love is a well from which we can drink only as much as we have put in, and the stars that shine from it are only our eyes looking in. |
| 46. | W. C. Fields | A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. |
| 47. | W. C. Fields | I'll have you know I don't drink anymore, on the other hand I don't drink any less either. |
| 48. | Will Sinclair | The only time I ever said no to a drink was when I misunderstood the question. |